As the calendar carries us into the holiday season, I’m committed to pulling out all the stops to make this year a huge celebration at the Hoover house. It’s not possible to retrieve the time lost last year, but we can be very intentional as we celebrate God’s blessings this year!

Among those blessings are all the magnificent things we are experiencing at NewSpring Church. Last weekend we had over 5,400 people and among those, 25 prayed to receive Christ as their personal Savior.

In my area of ministry we will be hosting four Starting Point Orientations this weekend to introduce this amazing opportunity to all of us who are still looking for answers to our questions. Check out NewSpring.org/startingpoint if you are interested.

I’ve heard some excerpts from this week’s message and it will be a life-changer. Take a deep breath, plug in your brightest smile and prepare to be BLESSED!

Anyway, in the two morning services, with time limited due to the appeal I made for volunteers, (by the way, thanks to all of you who responded so overwhelmingly… you really excited some leaders, I can tell you that!)  I actually had to leave out the third point in my list of things you want in your parenting experience. 

It was #3… Train.

Proverbs 22:6 is probably the most famous verse in the Bible on the subject of preparing kids for life.

Proverbs 22:6NIV
6 Train a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not turn from it.

Solomon is laying out a principle (as he often does in the Proverbs) that shows how life tends to work.  No question about that.  But what does the Bible mean when it uses the word train?

Funny thing about that Hebrew word, it’s used in several other contexts that turn really interesting when applied to parenting.

1. Sometimes it means to dedicate.  The same word is used in describing the dedication of Solomon’s temple.   To dedicate something means to establish purpose, ownership, and direction.
2. It’s sometimes used to describe the launching of an arrow.  One little girl misquoted our verse like this: “Train up a child and away he goes.”  She might have got the verse wrong, but she nailed the truth.  They grow up fast.  You have to be careful about aiming an arrow, because they fly fast, and you can’t aim it again after it’s launched.
3. A flexible rod could be bent repeatedly until it adopted the desired bend, so that even if someone attempted to bend it back, it would fly back into shape.  I always think about Daniel’s parents.  They must have trained him over and over as a child that he was to only worship the true God.   While still a kid he was carried into captivity and wound up working in the administrations of four different kings (all of whom worshipped idol gods.)  Time after time, Daniel was pushed to compromise his values.  Read the book that bears his name and you’ll discover that each time, regardless of the incentive or the threat, he always kept his spiritual shape.  Here’s the importance of being consistent!
4. On occasion, the word is used to describe something Hebrew midwives would do in order to get infants to nurse.  They would make a thin paste of crushed dates, and rub a tiny amount in the baby’s palate.  This particular usage of the word, always reminds me as a dad, that one my key responsibilities is to help my kids develop appetites for things that are spiritually healthy.

Thanks for letting me finish the talk.

Mark

At the Hoover house, we just enjoyed a visit from some of our kin folks from Burnet, Texas. It was a sweet reunion for Mark’s dad, WM to spend time with three of his siblings, John, James and Faye and also John’s son, Dennis. When the Hoovers get together they eat, share stories and sing. These are memories to treasure.

Another big event coming up is the Almost 4th Celebration at NewSpring. We will be treated to a performance by the well-known Christian Comedian, Anita Renfroe. To express appreciation to all of our NewSpring volunteers, postcards have been sent out that can be exchanged for a free ticket. If you are a volunteer and have not received a postcard, please contact your ministry leader.

Happy Summer!

Mary Alice

Genesis 8:22
“As long as the earth remains, there will be planting and harvest, cold and heat, summer and winter, day and night.”

Since the earth is still here, we can continue to count on the seasons to keep coming around — even if they do arrive later than we would like.

Life at this Hoover house has been very fast paced lately with end of year school activities, family celebrations  and so many things going on at NewSpring.

A couple of things I especially enjoy being part of at NewSpring are Discovery Reception and Starting Point/Next Step. Last weekend four new Starting Point groups along with two Next Step Groups were launched. It’s an exciting journey getting to know everyone in those groups!

Also, this weekend I’ll be hosting Discovery Reception on Saturday and Sunday. I love meeting people who are coming to NewSpring and this is an opportunity to do just that while sharing with everyone what NewSpring is all about and how to get involved in a ministry — either as a participant or a volunteer. It’s also an opportunity to meet our leadership team in person.

Mark has a great message for this weekend — I get to hear previews as he prepares. This may be his most powerful message ever — and I’m not given to hyperbole.

Hope to see you at NewSpring this weekend!

Mary Alice

Well, that’s absolutely right. It was Monday and Thanksgiving isn’t until Thursday, but what does that have to do with anything? Then I realized what she was referring to. The music we had playing was Christmas music. For some people, it is not lawful to play Christmas music until after Thanksgiving.

I do want to say that I understand why this sentiment exists. Our celebration of the birth of Christ has been so commercialized that many years ago we were horrified when merchants starting putting up Christmas displays before Thanksgiving — wanting to capitalize on the more profitable holiday. Of course, I think I’ve observed Christmas displays going up as early as summer in recent years — but maybe that was my imagination. As Americans and as Christians, we also believe in the importance of a day to be thankful, so we want to keep things in their place in order to properly recognize both holidays.

Now Mark and I are definitely looking forward to celebrating Thanksgiving with our family, and we are very grateful for all of God’s blessings in our lives, so why in the world were we “jumping the gun” and listening to Christmas music before it is the official “Christmas Season?” Well, that’s a good question. I won’t try to answer for Mark, but I’ll give my excuse to be considered.

When I was growing up my three sisters and I took piano lessons. Every year, our teacher would have us either purchase or retrieve Christmas music to begin practicing the first of November. I was also in school band and chorus as well as church choir over the years and we always starting practicing Christmas music at least by November and in some cases, as early as September, so that we could be ready for the Christmas concerts that would take place in December. So it seems perfectly natural to listen to Christmas music — even before Thanksgiving.

I have to smile when I think of our oldest son, Jonathan, who loves Christmas music so much that (at least while he was still living at home), he would often get it out even in the summer months. Even in July, we would hear strains of  “I’m Dreaming of A White Christmas” wafting down from his upstairs bedroom. It’s a good thing the Thanksgiving police didn’t hear that!

Actually, I think it’s a shame that we don’t celebrate Jesus’ birth every day, just as it’s sad that we only celebrate His resurrection when it’s “official.” In fact, both Christmas and Easter should be days of Thanksgiving as well! In my opinion, we don’t have to wait for a special season to begin the celebration, so Happy Thanksgiving! Merry Christmas! and Happy Easter!

Mary Alice

What, with your experience with couples, do you feel is the most important key to a long happy marriage?

Unconditional love.

Long marriages are not always happy. This is a reality because life is not always happy. Living life as partners means you love on the good days and you love on the not-so-good days. You love when you don’t “feel like” loving. You love when your love is not reciprocated. You love when the future looks good and you love when it looks like there is no future.

It’s no accident that the marriage vows are about promising unconditional love. For the last several years, Mark has been using marriage vows based on 1 Corinthians 13. He wrote these vows for a special ceremony at NewSpring that took place back in 2004. Over 30 couples were on the platform as we recited these vows to our spouses in chorus. Since that day, almost every couple Mark has married has requested these vows. If you read 1 Corinthians 13 in the New Living Translation, you’ll recognize these words.

By the grace of God’s Holy Spirit, I will be patient and kind to you. Because I love you, I won’t demand my own way, or hold past faults against you. I will be loyal to you, always faithful from my heart. I will always believe the best about you. I will always defend you. My love for you will never end.

You said we as women are called to respect! Your husband is a godly man following biblical values! But you as the women find it hard to show respect! How?

First of all, we women need to remember that our “nature” is not to respect, it is to control (see Genesis 3). One of the first strategies to gain control, is to assume a superior position. I believe that is why so many women systematically dismantle their husband’s self-esteem. She is quick to point out each of his faults and failures and trumpet her own successes. A woman may say — even to herself — that she is providing constructive criticism to make her husband and their marriage better, but in reality this behavior is very destructive to both.

Back to the question, “How do you respect?” My answer would be that you choose to respect. Make a decision to stop looking for faults, stop all criticism (contructive or not) and start building up each attribute or action you see in your husband that you admire. Look hard for every positive thing and express admiration and gratitude sincerely and often.

Mary Alice

To set it up, in the first talk, I warned guys about making unfavorable comparisons of their wives to other women.  I guess that prompted this one…

 How do you handle the situation when the woman he constantly compares you to is his mother?

Bet your first inclination is to pack him up and drop him off at her door, but before it comes to that, try to help him see three things that he’s not getting.

1. I doubt he realizes how painful this is for you.  There’s nothing wrong with him remembering some positive quality his mother possesses, but when he uses that quality to show you up, he’s no longer honoring his mom, he’s inflicting damage on you.  Let him know, not in an accusative tone, but in an instructive way that his words hurt! 
2. Guys sometimes get the idea that the way to inspire their wives is to point out other women who are doing something better.  Most guys have no idea how much pressure women put on themselves to measure up favorably to other women, and when the man whom they look to for comfort makes them feel inadequate, it has a devastating effect.  Help him understand  that kind of unfavorable comparison doesn’t inspire you, it makes you feel like shutting down.
3. The obvious.  You’re not his mom. You’re his wife.  She may have strengths you don’t have, you have strengths she doesn’t, but that’s not the main point. The first thing the Bible says about marriage is in Genesis 2:24. God says a man leaves his father and mother and is joined to his wife.  Remind him that you are his wife, and to the best of your power, and within reason,  you want to do the things that will please him, but at the end of the day, you are who you are, the woman God made you to be.  You’re not his mom, you’re not trying to be her, and although you honor who she is in his life, you’re his WIFE!

Mark

Last week in Love Songs, my talk was on a man’s need for respect from a woman, and in each of the services I read a list that I compiled from a meeting with twelve NewSpring guys.  The list was the responses from two questions I asked them. What makes you feel respected? What makes you feel disrespected?  I went through the answers so fast that a number of you asked if I would give them again, so here they are.

What makes you feel respected?

1. Appreciation
2. Pleasant tone of voice
3. Comments of praise (especially made about him to others)
4. The feeling that he can be himself around her
5. When she goes out of her way to please him
6. Physical touch
7. The words, “I’m proud of you.”

What makes you feel disrespected?

1. The feeling of not being needed
2. Being down on her priority list
3. Being talked down to
4. Being criticized by someone and she doesn’t defend
5. Trying hard to please her but nothing seems to
6. Dishonesty

This weekend we’re talking about The Climb, the challenge of making marriage work for a lifetime. I can’t wait to get started.

Mark

In addition to Hoover family additions this year, we have celebrated NewSpring family additions with almost 300 people going public with their faith at Watermark 09.

Last weekend we had a great Starting Point Orientation with five new groups beginning Sept 12-13. By the way, there’s still time to sign up if you’re interested.

The new message series “Love Songs” also begins Sept 12-13.  Mark, Lance and the entire team have been preparing for this series for months and even though I get some previews, I can’t wait to see it all come together.

Speaking of “coming together,” I hope many more NewSpringers will consider making Saturday their preferred time to attend worship. I think there’s just a little more energy in the room on Saturdays and there’s definitely more music with XL. The main goal, of course, is to make more room for first time guests at 11 on Sundays. So give Saturday a try!